By Jane Ng

janeng@sph.com.sg

 

One of my most treasured pieces of feedback about my five-year-old son, Jason, has nothing to do with how he can spell, read or count.

The feedback, which had to do with his behaviour, came from a fellow parent at his former preschool, whose son was being bullied at the playground.

She said that instead of joining in the act or doing nothing about it, Jason put out his hands to stop the bullies from pretending to claw at her son’s face. She was touched and decided to let my husband and me know about it.

I appreciate this because unlike a piece of art work which he can bring home and show me, such behaviour which I want to reinforce, is intangible and would have been easily missed, had this parent not taken the initiative to let me know.

Likewise, when his teacher gives feedback, I tend not to pay much attention to the fact that he is usually among the first to complete his worksheets.

I’m more concerned about the next part of the feedback – that when he is not the first to finish, he doesn’t handle “failure” well and breaks down and cries.

To me, ABCs and 123s will eventually be picked up. Why insist that he perfect his handwriting at three, read at four or spell at five?

Conversely, qualities like resilience, the ability to handle failure, or having moral courage, may not necessarily be picked up even after he has mastered his ABCs. So I would rather focus on these.

The previous week’s announcement by the Education Ministry that there will be greater focus on values and character education in all schools struck a chord with me.

But to be honest, my immediate reaction was to wonder, isn’t this part of the education system already? You mean teachers are not doing enough of it?

On second thought, the fact that the Education Minister has come out to say it, might mean a renewed emphasis on character education, and that can only be good for the children.

But it is a tough road ahead. Afterall, a primary education review committee had recommended two years ago that there be no examinations in Primary 1 and 2, but some schools still find it hard to part with year-end examinations.
Not surprisingly, parents are the ones pushing for them. They say doing away with exams at the lowest levels may do more harm than good since their children still have the PSLE to sit at Primary 6.

So going back to the renewed focus on values and character education, the first step schools have to take would be to get buy-in from not just teachers and students, but also parents.

Tell parents the focus on character education will not be at the expense of academic results. With the robust education system that we have, driving home the importance of good values will not dilute the essence of the system. It is not a situation of one or the other.

In fact, bright students may learn to accept that not having straight As does not mean the end of the world. Recognising it would not mean a lowering of standards, but an ability to accept failure and move on to achieve other things.

The second step would be to recognise that schools are building on what they are already doing.

Character education is something all schools practise perhaps to different degrees. So it is not about introducing a new subject, but rather how values education can be made more relevant and interesting for the children, or incorporated into everyday lessons.

The final step would be to work together with parents to build on the desirable character traits you want to see in the children.

Parents who play an active role in inculcating values in their children not only make the school’s job easier but also will likely see better behaviour from their children. In fact, the parents’ role is all the more important since values are often caught and not taught.

If I had it my way, I would say, head for the playground, learn to defend your friends or play as a team, because life’s most important lessons are not taught in the classrooms.

Jason recently learnt another lesson at the playground. The day after Mid-Autumn Festival celebrations, we walked past the estate playground where we had carried lanterns and lit candles the night before. Looking at the candle wax-covered pavement, Jason remarked: “Uncle will have a hard time cleaning up today.”

He’s not that civic-minded, not yet, anyway. He was just parroting what I said about our estate’s friendly cleaner before we left the playground the night before.

But it’s a start.