IN JAKARTA
ABDULLAH GYMNASTIAR, once Indonesia's most respected cleric, saw his career take a nosedive as soon as he announced his decision to take a second wife.
The turban-clad, leather-jacketed preacher, popular as Aa Gym, lost his weekly TV presentation contract, ceased to appear at any government event and fought unsuccessfully to save his companies from bankruptcy.
Opinion sections of every newspaper were filled with letters condemning the preacher's decision, most readers viewing it as betrayal and very few writing in to defend him. He has since faded from public view.
His is not the only case.
Puspo Wardoyo, owner of the Wong Solo barbeque chicken restaurant chain, enjoyed a booming business for years. The fast-growing chain of Wong Solo family restaurant outlets, enjoyed media limelight until one day he boasted how he was being fair to each of his four wives by endowing one outlet to each.
His business has since reversed its upward swing. Most Wong Solo outlets wear a deserted look and many have had to be shut down due to the lack of customers.
The moral of the above stories is that Indonesians do not take kindly to polygamy.
Many Indonesian men are monogamous, with the women playing an influential role in family decisions, be it as small as picking a restaurant for the family to go eat.
Wardoyo learnt that it is important to be sensitive to the sentiments of all your clients, especially if the client is a woman.
Last week, media reports said that an Indonesian ministry will propose to Parliament to pass a law to punish men who committ an “illegal” polygamy.
If the draft bill on polygamy, drawn up by the country's ministry of religion, is ratified by Parliament, it would require Muslim men planning to take a second, third or fourth wife, to get a written consent from their spouse/s for the same as well as to prove that they are financially capable of providing for all of them.
Any breaches of the proposed legislation would lead to three months jail term for the men and a fine of five million rupiah (about S$700).
The move may be surprising to foreigners, but to Indonesians it is not a surprise at all.
Although the country is often refered to as having the world's largest Muslim population, it is time the world also sees Indonesia as a country which deeply respects the institution of marriage and its sanctity. Polygamists have often faced social stigma and ostracism.
The system works for itself. Just ask Aa Gym and Puspo Wardoyo.